Ashley Arsenic™/// On a scale of one to arson I'm the shit get over it

Its funny how we never really concintrate on how one choice can entirely change your life, and yet we still do things with out thinking. We still lead our lives by just concintrating on what our hearts tell us to do and not what our heads. Is life about a constant battle between your head and your heart? Or is there ever a compromise area where they actually agree?

My lifes become hell in a handbag, I got in a car accident and i hurt my knee. I had to drop outa school because my school has this dumb rule where you can only be out 14 days, and they count weekends. Bogus. Yesterday morning I signed myself outa school. I can go back in September, but wow, that just sucks. I just got down on the clinic and was doing hair. I was doing good. For the first time in a while i actually had friends who made me feel good about myself.

Now the friends are still there. But they all live like an hour away. Some even more. We still talk through texts and phone calls. But I havent really seen any of them. And thier all gonna be outa school by the time I get back. Are you really friends with someone if the only time you mainly hang out is at Beauty School? Thats a question thats been bothering me. I know theres a point when aquaintiances become friends, but how do you know which is which. It all seems like grey area.

Being home all day makes me think alot. I like to think. I need to do something with myself while im home. Something constructive. Maybe I'll write a book. I have all this creativity locked up inside me dying to get out. I need some kinda creative outlit. I cant play any instruments. And since I cant do hair cause of my stupid knee. Maybe I'll write till September. What I dont know. I cant even keep my Blog going.

I know im horrible at updating. I'll try more.

Who's listened to the new panic CD? I'm listening to it in IMEEM.com right now. I have to say I'm not impressed at all. I'm not hating or anythign. But I felt the first one was better. I like a few songs so far. But I had all this built up inticipation for thier new cd, and it doesnt sound anything like the first one. Which i mean thats good. The whole point of releasing new cds is to show your musical growth i suppose. But hmm to am I the only who feels they changed thier whole sound?

I dont feel like getting up and dancing, i feel like sitting back and chilling. And with Panic at the disco i was used to wanting to dance to thier music. Slightly dissapointed. Maybe once i get past the shock of the sound change, maybe I can fully appreciate the music. But I'm not one of those girls who obsess over them.

I listen to thier music because its good, and if I dont like it. I dont pretend to just to make people who are obsessed with thier music happy. Frankly people who obsess over things annoy me. I know i used to be obsessed with Audrey Kitching. But I've done some growing up recently. I like Audrey Kitching, and I'll admit that I read her Blogs, look at her pics and when i have the capibility to, I watch her videos.

But I dont spend every moment of my time sitting her obsessed over her, googling her, surrounding myself with everything Audrey like I used to. I admire her, shes pretty, she has the guts to be herself and speak her mind. Shes herself and shes sucessful because of it. And you know what those are admireable qualities.

And I dont mean to put anyone down in the least bit, and im trying to be as tactful as I can. But People who spend all thier time obsessing over these bands, surrounding thierselves with everything Panic at the disco, Fall out boy, ect. Dont take this the wrong way but, is your life seriously that boring that you have nothing better to do? Because if you cant have a decent conversation with out mentioning them. Wow, sad. Turn off the computer, put down your iPod, and go outside. Socialize with people, and talk about something other then bands. Did you know thiers an Election going on? Which canidate are you endorcing, which one are you against.

Seriously if people would spend less time on the computer researching things that are pointless and actually researched things that impacted the world, maybe we'd have a cure for Cancer, or maybe we'd have a cure for aids or something. You know. I know I probably sound like a total bitch right now. But maybe I'm making a point to someone, maybe someones reading this and saying oh snap. I honestly wana help people.

I know what its like to have your life revolve around the computer, to be completely obsessed with something that when you get home from school you HAVE to see if they've updated thier page, and when they do thats ALL you have to talk about. And its not healthy at all. We need to expand our herizons, we need to open our minds and become educated or We'll end up being a generation whos deaf and dumb to everything around us.